Why I’m Not Setting Yearly Goals This Year

Frost-covered winter plants in January

January has its own rhythm. Fresh notebooks, new intentions, neatly framed yearly goals. I’ve taken part in that ritual for years, and I genuinely enjoyed it. I like structure. I like clarity. I like having a sense of direction.

But this year, I didn’t set any yearly goals. Not because I’m slowing down, tired, or giving up (I’ll come back to the slowing down part later), but because I no longer need a twelve-month deadline to stay focused. Somewhere along the way, I realised that my life works better when it’s guided by systems rather than predictions. And that realisation quietly changed everything.

Looking back, the biggest difference between how I stayed focused then and how I do now comes down to two shifts.

The first was realising that there is absolutely no need to give yourself a twelve-month deadline in order to stay focused. For a long time, I believed that a year needed a clear container, otherwise everything would drift. But over time, and especially as a business owner, I learned that it isn’t long-term deadlines that keep things moving. It’s systems. Systems run the show, people! Trying to run everything from your own head is exhausting.

Once that clicked, the second shift followed naturally. At some point, the wall planners I had designed for myself simply couldn’t cope anymore. They had worked well initially and were thoughtfully structured around how I understood focus and planning at the time. I even made them available to buy, because I genuinely believed in them.

But as life expanded, they no longer had enough flexibility to absorb change. They were beautiful and tactile, and well structured, but they relied on life staying within a shape that no longer existed. Eventually, they stopped working for the way my life actually functioned.

By the middle of 2022, I had to admit that I needed to lean into digital, even though I had been resisting it for years. It wasn’t an inspired decision. It was a desperate one. I tried Structured for about a year, and while it was better, it still didn’t fully absorb real life. I kept having to bend myself around the tool, rather than the tool supporting me.

A laptop and a smartphone displaying a task list, with a cup of tea in the background on a desk.

Eventually, after a lot of research and trial and error, I landed on Todoist. This isn’t an advert. It just happens to work almost perfectly for me. More importantly, using it brought something else back into focus. It reminded me of the GTD method, a book I briefly picked up years ago while waiting for a flight, long before marriage, children, or the café. I didn’t have the life complexity back then to really understand it.

Coming back to it now was different. It took time to settle into the method properly, but once it clicked, I knew this was it. I now organise my life using that framework, with Todoist handling tasks and Google Calendar giving me time awareness and space. Together, they give me flexibility without chaos.

Ironically, letting go of paper didn’t make my life less intentional. It made it more honest. I still love stationery, and one day I might create paper tools to support parts of this system. But there’s no rush. What I have right now works well enough, and that feels important too.

Close-up of frost-covered, brown leaves on a tree branch with a snowy background.

Slow living is often misunderstood as doing less, planning less, or letting days unfold without much intention. For me, it’s almost the opposite. Slow living only works when there is enough structure underneath to hold things gently, without constant mental effort.

One of the ideas that really stayed with me when I returned to the Getting Things Done method was the phrase “mind like water”. The image is simple. Water responds appropriately to whatever lands in it. A pebble creates ripples, a stone makes a splash, and then the surface settles again. Nothing is held onto longer than necessary.

That’s the state I realised I was craving. Not a perfectly calm life, but a mind that isn’t constantly gripping unfinished thoughts, forgotten tasks, or vague worries about what I might be missing. When everything has a trusted place to land, your mind is free to be present. And presence, I’ve learned, is a big part of what slow living actually feels like.

This is where structure stops being rigid and starts being supportive. Systems don’t rush me. They don’t demand productivity for productivity’s sake. They simply catch things so I don’t have to. And when my mind isn’t busy holding everything together, I move through days more slowly, even when life itself isn’t slow at all.`

By the time I reached this point, the decision not to set yearly goals felt fairly obvious. My days are already held by systems I trust, and I no longer need a twelve-month container to stay focused or motivated. Yearly goals assume a level of predictability that doesn’t exist in my life right now. Letting them go has made space, not taken anything away.

While I’m not setting yearly goals this year, I’m not against goals altogether. I still like direction and momentum. What I’ve let go of is the pressure of distant outcomes and fixed deadlines.

Instead, I’m leaning into challenges. That’s the word I’ve used for years, and it still fits. Small, self-set challenges that live in the present. Doing one thing a day, or one thing a week, for as long as it feels useful. No finish line to race towards, no need to perform, and no guilt if life gets in the way.

A hand holding a paintbrush applies blue watercolors to a piece of white paper, with a palette of paint visible in the background.

I’ve approached things this way many times before. A photography challenge where I learned one DSLR skill at a time, and a watercolour challenge that helped me brush up my painting skills. Neither had a fixed outcome attached to them, but both quietly improved my confidence and ability over time.

That’s why challenges make more sense to me now. They create movement without pressure and learning without force. They fit into the systems I already trust, and they allow things to grow at a pace that feels honest.

This is simply where I am right now, in this season of life.

Sometimes the most helpful thing we can do is notice what no longer fits, and make space for something that does. Letting go of a twelve-month plan has given me more calm, not less, and more presence, not drift.

That feels like a good place to begin the year.

Happy New Year,
Rasa xx

What the Café Taught Me About Letting Go

Two women seated at a wooden table in a café, clinking their coffee cups together. A decorative wall behind them features the words 'Heaven is welcome here' along with colorful flowers and leaves.

I thought visiting my old café would feel a bit like meeting an ex who’s doing just fine without you…
And in a way, it did — but honestly, I couldn’t be happier to see it taking its own new course while I do too.

I went with my friend Vicki and Heida while visiting the UK, and the moment we walked in, it all felt familiar — the same laughter, the same rhythm — just no longer mine. The coffee was still excellent, the familiar faces still warm, and that felt surprisingly good. Sitting there with my flat white (or three) and a couple of slices of Millionaire’s shortbread, I realised how ready I was to have moved on.

What began as a love story — of community, creativity, and caffeine — had simply run its course. Friendly Nettle is ready to step away from café life (at least for now) and dip its toes into something more creative.

A hand holding a teal coffee cup with latte art on a wooden table, surrounded by green plant leaves.

Running a café taught me more than I ever expected — especially about what really makes a business work. I learned that profit matters; without it, even the busiest place slowly turns into a charity. I thought I was being frugal (some of my staff might say stingy 😅), but what I really needed were better systems. Efficiency is everything when every day is unpredictable.

A vibrant mural featuring a large orange flower with green leaves and a small bird sitting on its petals, against a soft blue background.

I also learned that space can be both a gift and a trap — mine was far too big, and the play area far too much to manage. And I finally saw the difference between running a café and creating a space for creativity — they’re not the same thing. Along the way I learned patience, leadership, and the quiet art of trusting my instincts — especially when it was time to let go. I discovered I loved hosting experiences — clubs, workshops, and meet-ups — far more than the daily service rush.

A child in a yellow sweater and pink skirt is playing in a cozy café setting with a chalkboard wall covered in drawings and writings. A bookshelf nearby contains various books, and toys are scattered on the green carpet.

Most importantly, I realised the pace that truly suits me is slower, more intentional, and more creative. And that a clear vision only stays clear if you stop trying to please everyone.

So, as Friendly Nettle moves away from café life and into a more creative path, my hope is that it continues to bring people together — through creativity, craftsmanship, and slow living. To inspire a return to making, sharing, and noticing life’s quieter joys. The café chapter may have closed, but the spirit behind it hasn’t gone anywhere; it’s simply changing form.

And if I ever opened another café one day, I think I’d tuck it into a library — a place already filled with stories and silence. Because what is a book without coffee? I’d bake more, teach more, create spaces for making and mending, and let conversations brew slowly — like a good sourdough.

A woman sitting at a wooden table, holding a cup of coffee, with a green patterned wall in the background.

Here’s to new beginnings (and one more flat white).
Rasa x

My reflections on 2018

As I sit here and reflect on the past year, I am actually panicking due to the many tasks I still need to complete. It has been a busy year indeed! I think I need to accept that some of the goals I planned were not achieved. But that’s ok, right? Having set goals does not mean you have to achieve them all, but have them as a guideline to keep you focused. And I definitely felt focused this year. Therefore I decided today to reflect on what I have achieved so I can set new goals for the next year instead. Sounds fair? I think so!

1. This year I have created more art, thanks to my watercolour challenge. Not only has it been lot’s of fun, but also taught me a new few tricks for handwriting and definitely created more wall art that I can hang on our wall.

2. I really enjoyed the gardening, thanks to my goal to create a child friendly garden. We  were very lucky with the green house and very hot summer. Gardening has been the most enjoyable goal so far! I think I will carry on gardening next year as well!!

3. We have had the most enjoyable holidays. Although we did not plan most of it, the trip to France with friends made my year!

I enjoyed more walks this year, discovered our local forest and a new forest school for kids too! We have even started sharing one car to reduce costs and motivate me to do more walking. Hope to walk even more this year as we start doing school runs.

5. Have been more experimental with baking thanks to all the birthday cakes I baked for both of my kids!

6. And finally we have completed our kitchen renovations! Although I thought we would have completed it earlier this year, we took a little longer than expected. We have however have something exciting coming up next year, so bear with us ;-).

Happy New Year everyone!
Rasa xoxo

Hey I am back! (my feedback on phone free month)

Last month I said I would ditch my phone for a month (well… almost) and here we are I did it and now I am back to tell you all about it (if you care to listen). It was indeed what I was expecting, freedom like you could not believe! Even now when I am back using social media I started thinking how to minimalise the use of it (and I am not even back on Facebook properly!!)
I started my little experiment when we were on our do-nothing-all-day-every-day holiday in the Dominican Republic. I removed the most distracting apps from my phone such as Facebook, Instagram, Pinterest and WhatsApp and instantly I did not know what to do with myself. I still kept checking my phone although there was nothing to browse other than s few text messages that I occasionally get. I started reading more and only after few weeks I realised that I stopped checking my phone so much. I originally wanted to switch my smart phone completely to a basic phone, but I soon realised there is no need and besides there were a few complications around doing that (such as a transfer of contacts from one phone to another). I also really really needed my map app as I would really get lost without it.

As soon as we were back from our holidays I threw myself into preparations for Tomas birthday and DIY projects to make progress with our new kitchen. It was a breath of fresh air not to be distracted by any notifications from my phone. Although there were a few occasions where I needed certain information and I had to go into Facebook messenger just to get the right address or to get a recipe from Pinterest. And there was one time when I misplaced my phone when I was about to leave the house and I knew I needed to keep in contact with Joni that day (so it was quite panicky). But other than that it was a very productive month. 

I was hoping because of my phone free month that I will spend more quality time with my kids, but to be honest I was too busy getting things done (sadly). I did however occasionally involve Lukas in home decorating such as covering ugly plastered wall with this lovely painting (he is still so proud of it when he sees it hanging on the wall!). 

On the final days of the month things got little challenging. Tomas got ill straight after his birthday party, but that does not stop me from saying that February was productive and clear in focus just because I was less distracted by my phone. I started reading my bible and even started thinking more about opening my dream cafe earlier then expected…
However I have one advice to anyone thinking of ditching their phone for a month. Do let everybody know that you are doing this. You would be surprised to know how many people tried to contact me through iMessage or WhatsApp. Even though I posted here about my intensions, this obviously did not reach everybody.

Hope I inspired you and I hope you will enjoy your phone free month if you are going for it some time this year.
Rasa xoxo.

Why I'm putting my phone down for 28 days

So here is a good idea, how about we ditch our smartphones for a month?! This is what I thought when somebody I follow on Instagram claimed they did it last year. Back then I thought it’s not a good timing to do it, but I was definitely interested in the freedom (I presumed) I would get. So I decided February is best and not only because it is shortest of all months. It’s because February is least eventful I suppose (minus Tomas birthday and Valentine’s Day)! And now I am getting really excited about this idea!!! And here are few good reasons why:
1. Need some time off. Can you imagine how much time I will save if I stop using my phone? Loads! I must admit I am practically living on Instagram, Facebook and Pinterest and often flashing notification really distract me from doing the really important stuff. I can’t highlight enough how much time is wasted on media and because I will be stopping the use of media I decided not to blog for a month too. Because let’s admit it, it’s ok to take a break sometimes and get the other stuff done that never really gets done. Why? Because I am doing day to day jobs while still going through Instagram feed and while putting kids to sleep (please don’t judge).
2. Refocus! I am hoping while I am not constantly plugged into media, I may be able to start realising what is more important in my life. Because of screen I have been ignoring my kids sometimes. Sometimes I am so deep into reading an article that I don’t see my own child trying to get my attention. Hopefully I will get inspired not by Pinterest pictures but by images I see outside my phone screen.
3. I need to rest my eyes for a bit. Because let’s be honest, my eyesight is not getting any better. Not that they are getting worst either. What I really mean, I just need rest, a true rest.

Ok, those were my reasons and here are my terms. How else would you know if I am not cheating!
I am actually going to read my texts and answer the phone calls! I am only ditching my smart phone and instead I am going to use one of those basic phones. We got one spare in case one of our phones breaks, so it will be easy to switch.
I will read e-mails once in the while on my laptop. And I might need to switch back to my smart phone when I need directions. I will try memorise google maps as much as I can or print out directions like in good old days.
And that’s it, hope I remembered to mention everything in here.

Do you want to join me? It’s not too late and it does not have to be in February (you can pick a month most convenient to you)! Hope I inspired you 😉
Rasa xoxo

January favourites!

It’s February already and instead of sharing about things I look forward in this month I have decided to review the previous month. After all, it’s good to plan and look forward to the future but it’s also great to look back and review your favourite moments and what you have already achieved in your goal planning.
If I had to describe January in one word I would call it “calm” or “peaceful”. I felt so much more in control of things this month then any other. Could that be because I had spend the first week of this year at the beach (well, almost), or is it because I set more realistic goals this time? Anyhow, my new calendar (that I designed and planned myself, free printable is here) really helped me to take small steps towards my monthly goals!

One of my goals this year to read more books. I am on my last chapters of “Flora and Grace” and I am so looking forward to sharing with you about it!

I am also getting slowly addicted to Instagram (only slightly). Although I don’t post many pics myself, I love following some creative people out there! @andsmilestudio is my fav! However I quite miss Pinterest system where you can save the pins into a board (so you could come back to it later). Instead I worked out that I can take a screen shot to save some of very very very inspiring Instagrams!

And I also thought I will post this pic of Leia helping me to organise my yarn stash! Surprisingly she is not the one who messes it up (it’s me mostly), but the most trouble she creates when I try to focus on my work and she want to be right there in front of me… grrrr!

One of my most fun weekends this month were spend with Vicki. She came to visit us all the way to Bedford (from Surrey)!

And not to mention snow (first this year) by the end of the month! Last chance to wear my super woolen boots :-).

Happy week everyone!
Rasa xoxo

The Kennedy Space Centre and Cocoa Beach

I may have never told you how me and Joni actually met. I was always a bit embarrassed to admit it happened on eHarmony (yes… one of “those” stories). But when I think back now, it wasn’t really the website that connected us — it was space.

At the time I was completely obsessed with the magic of it — the majesty, the beauty, the quiet mystery of space itself. Definitely not the rockets! I just wanted to experience the feeling of it, the vastness, the wonder. And then I noticed Joni’s profile said aerospace engineer. So naturally I contacted him, not for dating (that came much later!), but to find out more about space.

Of course, Joni’s reasons for wanting to go to space were totally different. He’s fascinated by the science, the engineering, the rockets — all the technical things I wasn’t even thinking about. But somehow our different versions of the same dream linked us up.

Fast-forward to now, and we recently went to Florida for Joni’s work conference. And on our few days off we did the two things that make the most sense for us as a couple: we visited the beach and the Kennedy Space Center. It sounds completely random, but actually those two dreams of mine — to go to space and to be near the seaside — have always lived side by side.

Cocoa Beach was everything I love: white sand dunes with just a little bit of greenery, like an unfinished canvas where I could imagine something colourful. And then suddenly, a huge rocket somewhere in the distance reminding me of Joni’s world. How random are we?

What surprised me most was how close these two places really are, not just geographically but in history too. Back in the 60s this whole beach town was full of people working on America’s space program. This is literally where astronauts came to rest when they were not in space! I love that.

And I swear, that car tyre print on the sand looked a little bit like the foot steps found on the surface of the moon… don’t you think?

Also loved this Kennedy Space Centre star globe fountain with my reflection in it!

Cocoa Beach in the fog look sort of dreamy… 

I hope I got the attention of some of the cosmic dreamers (or seaside lovers) out there 😉
Rasa

My favourite moments of 2014

A woman with long dark hair and a warm smile stands in front of the Eden Project's geodesic domes, wearing a black coat and blue scarf.

Hey dear crafters! Today is the last day of 2014! Are you ready for new beginnings? I love a fresh start, but also loved 2014. The year that is about to end was exciting and fun. This year is the year is when one of my biggest dreams came through as I got married to Joni!
2014 started with a trip to Eden Project. I like going somewhere warm while it’s cold outside! While the Eden Project isn’t in a hot country it’s easy to imagine it is when you are surrounded by tropical plants. I feel super lucky to be able to travel to Florida this January (so looking forward! my bags are already packed with many summer dresses!).
If I had to pick my favourite knitting project of 2014, I would definitely choose my knitted cable sweater. It’s the first sweater I have ever knitted and I love it so much up to this day and wear it quite frequently.

A woman standing outdoors in a grassy area, wearing a knitted cable sweater and denim jeans, gesturing with her hands.

2014 is when Joni visited Lithuania for the first time to meet my parents. It was a very misty weekend!

A woman standing on a hill with arms outstretched, wearing a black coat and a brown bag, with a misty landscape in the background.

Visiting Aunt Olivia in Beaulieu was also quite memorable (especially all those wild ponies!).

A woman in a patterned dress standing on a rocky beach with a serene ocean in the background, smiling and enjoying a sunny day.

I love spring and 2014 spring has been the bestiest so far! See what I have created while enjoying the meadow!

A person smiling while wearing a crown made of yellow dandelions, seated outdoors with green grass and small flowers in the background.

A huge thanks to Suzanne for organising the most amazing Hen-do ever!

Two women smiling and laughing in a busy street; one is wearing a tiara and piggybacking the other, creating a joyful atmosphere.

My Wedding preparations has been stressful on some occasions, but I am thankful for the moments I had with Vicki. She was the only one who was able to fit me into my wedding dress

A bride in a wedding dress looks at herself in a mirror, with a friend sitting on a couch in the background.

Our Wedding was perfect if not better how we expected. The only thing I would do differently is choose the photographer carefully, especially when they are your friends.

A joyful couple celebrating their wedding, surrounded by guests throwing confetti in a picturesque outdoor setting.

We spend our honeymoon in Tuscany where we enjoyed plenty of wine. You would never guess where we wanted to go for our honeymoon originally! It was Iceland, but we thought it would be nice to visit it in different season. Next autumn perhaps, to see the Northern Lights?
Here I am wearing one of the bridesmaid dresses that I made. I loved it so much that I wear it so often (thankful to Nicola for giving it back to me).

A woman with long hair and glasses is smiling slightly while resting her chin on her hand. She is wearing a patterned dress and standing outdoors with a blurred background of buildings.

After a honeymoon we had another Wedding celebrations in Lithuania. This was Joni’s second time in my home country!

A couple seated outdoors on a bench, surrounded by greenery, with the woman wearing a green dress and the man in a grey suit.

In September for my birthday we welcomed Princess Leia into our team.  She is so fun to play with (a bit distracting when I am trying to get some work done!).

A person sitting on a blue couch with a laptop, playfully interacting with a cat lying on its back.

Visited Granny Elizabeth twice in lovely Cley-next-the-Sea!

Three people smiling together outdoors with a windmill in the background.

Visiting Lithuania for Christmas is a nice way to end the year! I just wish there were snow on the seaside…

A person wearing a grey knitted hat and a black coat stands on a sandy beach, smiling and looking down, with windblown hair and beach grass in the background.

I hope you have great New Year celebrations and may 2015 bring you fresh new beginnings 😉
Rasa x

Things I look forward to in July

A workspace featuring various stacked and unstacked painted flower pots, with a small plant in the center and a red lamp in the background.

I can’t believe the wedding month is round the corner! Only one week left until the big day! Here is what I am looking forward to in July :-D.
1. OUR WEDDING of course! There are still a lot of things left to do for the day, but hoping my to-do list will soon be ticked off just on time ;-). Here is how my house looks like right now with all the wedding prep stuff.

A collection of freshly painted terracotta pots in various sizes arranged on brown paper, surrounded by greenery. A person's black shoe is visible in the foreground.

2.HONEYMOON, as we are going to Tuscany! I have visited Italy before with my friends and loved it, so really excited to revisit here with Joni :-).

A couple sitting next to a vintage red car in a quaint Italian street, surrounded by rustic buildings and greenery.

3. MOVING OUT. As mentioned previously we are moving to Bedford which I really looking forward to. My house in London is being rented out to a lovely lady ;-).  Here is how my house has been marketed  on Winkworth. Feeling so envious of that wide lens camera :-(. 

Interior view of a cozy living room featuring a dark sofa with patterned cushions, a small coffee table, a workspace with a chair and a desk, and large glass doors leading to a garden.

4. NEW CAMERA. Yep, have decided that this is the end of the era for iPhone pics. I have learned a lot on photography just by taking phone pics for the blog. However I am really ready for DSLR I think, don’t you?
Have a lovely week!
Rasa xoxo